It was "May the 4th Be With You" day. I probably would have found some way to watch one of the Star Wars movies, or holler like a Wookie, but instead I spent the first half of the day in the hospital. I was 8 weeks pregnant and started spotting about five days earlier. I wish I had known sooner that you should see the doctor if you bleed more than three days in a row, all I knew was that spotting was normal. But the spotting slowly increased until on Saturday my mother in law suggested going to a clinic to get checked out. I called the Tricare nurse line because I was scared and didn't know where to go, and at their suggestion to the hospital I went. There was a lot of waiting and a lot of Chip and Joanna Gaines on our room's TV. After several hours of worrying and cramping, it was the ultrasound that confirmed my suspicions. No heart beat. They didn't have to tell me, I could just tell by the picture on the screen. The doctor warned me that a miscarriage
I found out about a book that explains how I feel about this subject: I seriously hate dating. Something that has been a blessing to me is the counsel from Pres.Uchtdorf that he gave in a CES fireside in November of 2009: "I know this may be a disappointment for some of you, but I don’t believe there is only one right person for you. I think I fell in love with my wife, Harriet, from the first moment I saw her. Nevertheless, had she decided to marry someone else, I believe I would have met and fallen in love with someone else. I am eternally grateful that this didn’t happen, but I don’t believe she was my one chance at happiness in this life, nor was I hers." Dating and finding my eternal companion is all my choice! Nobody controls this part of my life except for me . "There are those who do not marry because they feel a lack of “magic” in the relationship. By “magic” I assume they mean sparks of attraction. Falling in love is a wonderful feel
Get to feeling better! I won't let you get me sick :) Really. I'm sorry that you had to miss Barrett's graduation. But at least I'm not alone in missing out on everything. Did Barrett's graduating class do anything fun for graduation? I got my super trunky papers today. AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! No gracias! Hna. Bundy says that the MTC is for the new missionaries to de-worldatize themselves. There should be something like that for returning missionaries. Between the freak out of finishing and having to sign up for classes at BYU-I, I'm starting to hate my internet time. I tried signing up for classes but it won't let me. I want to say ENOUGH! Trust the Lord shall be my motto, because it's totally out of my hands now. Okay. This week has been kind of a shocker. One of my converts, who everyone thought was doing really well stopped coming to church and began going to her old church. I have to call her because I haven't seen her in a long while.
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